Life in Limbo II

CNY 2012 II

2012-01-30T20:43:00.000+08:00

Aiyehh!!! Whatcha doing!?

At Ronald's CNY gathering, I promised myself that I would take a photo with every single guest, which I almost accomplished until the 2 bottles of wine I guzzled kicked in. So here are the pictures before I got inebriated.

Host of the party.

Australian open. Nuff said.

Random iPhone Snaps

2012-01-29T13:35:00.003+08:00

Finally managed to transfer my iPhone pics to my mac. Who knew such a simple task belied such intricacies!

I have no explanations for this act of atrocity.

Check out the road names in Ashburton.

The many earthquakes we felt.

Forgot to take pics of my sumptuous mussels while on the way to Queenstown: the one in New Zealand, not the one next to Bukit Merah.

So I snapped pics of the remnants.

Remember I kept 'chomping' on wild flowers in those NZ pics? This one here is the real deal. And it tasted like, erm, chicken.

Christchurch's NYE party by the park.

Possibly South Island's ONLY gay club.

First time I see Monkey drinking anything remotely alcoholic!

Sunset in Bintan. I should be living there.

I know my recent posts have been rather erratic, but hey, I'm too busy nursing my hangovers. So give me a break, will ya!? Sheesh!

CNY 2012

2012-01-29T13:11:00.002+08:00

Chinese New Year this year was great, with endless gatherings and of course booze aplenty. Best of all, my aunt from Seattle dropped by with my cousin, the cutest little toddler ever.

I've never been a cam whore but decided to go apeshit at Monkey's party. Look out for the bonus pic at the end.

Doing a Martha Stewart at Monkey's

Why are some pics taken with the iPhone so grainy?

I should seriously consider Botox.

Here's the cutest little toddler ever. Taught him to call me 表哥. And he said 鸟哥. Cursing at such a young age, hai~

He's gonna kill me when he grows up and found out I posted his naked pic. Better pixellate his 小鸡鸡.

The bonus pic: Ivana's SQ girl look. Just missing the blue eye shadow and red lipstick! Hahahhaa.

Something Wicked in the Air

2012-01-15T15:56:00.000+08:00

First things first, this post is nothing about the musical. So here I go. I can't say for sure but I suspect I may have a special ability. An ability whose control I haven't yet mastered. It's the ability to curse a place. Seriously if there was a jinx of the year award, it'd probably have came to me.

The first apparent incident was back in 2008 when we went to Egypt. Right after we left, a bomb detonated in Khan El Khalili Bazaar in Cairo, a place we were just at the night before we headed home. This was followed by the major fire in a Bangkok club that killed many. And then there was that triple whammy in Japan. Now there's that freak hot air balloon accident in New Zealand.

Before we left for Bintan, Gilbert said if something were to happen in Bintan right after we left, it'd be really creepy.

Guess what, two Singaporeans just drowned in Bintan.

Freaky!

Even my colleagues picked up on the spate of unfortunate events. So they asked for my travel plans for the year and I dutifully told them that I'll be heading for Korea in April and New York in September.

And then I remembered that Renne and Monkey were with me on every one of the trips mentioned above. So they may be the jinx. Guess we'll know after Korea.

The Big Three-O

2012-01-10T22:58:00.001+08:00

The Big Three-O rolled by without so much as a squeak. But that's the way I intended it to be. No fancy parties, no gimongous gathering of friends, no endless strings of dinners. Not that I don't enjoy those anymore, it's just that I want one of the turning points of my life to be spent somewhat quietly with some self-reflection of the past 30 years of my existence, rather than be busy making sure guests are kept well hydrated.

How well self-reflected am I now? Probably as much as when I was 29. Thing is, I was too busy enjoying my own self-reflection in the villa pool to be occupied with the philosophical sort.

After dinner with my aunt and gang on Friday, I ended up at Tantric with a couple of friends who so kindly bought me champagne to mark the occasion. Rather out of character, I could barely keep my eyes opened and get this, I only had ONE glass of champagne. Let me say that again, ONE glass of champagne. ONE glass. I never do ONE glass of champagne. I never do ONE glass of anything!

That's age catching up on me when the clock struck twelve to mark the thirtieth year of my life! Can this phrase get anymore literal?!?

Thankfully I woke up refreshed for my luxurious stay at the Banyan Tree Bintan with the NZ gang and Pao.

And oh I gotta mention that I wore those darn Tod's and they tore my feet apart!! Shredded! How could I have picked a size too small? I'm upset beyond words. And here I thought expensive shoes will be molded to my feet regardless of which size they are. What a letdown. Stupid shoes. And here are the pictures of the weekend.

On the ferry to Bintan.

Monkey on the right has been here 7 times! That rich primate. Perhaps he feels at home among the verdure?

Renne's new camera. Power.

Lunch view.

Hmmm, yum.

After this shot we shifted inside cos the sun was scorching. Such babies we are!

The keropok is mine!

Buggy ride to the pool!!

Fact is, we gotta ride the buggy to get anywhere. Even to pee.

No DI!

Should have DI-ed!

Change direction so the wind will be in favour of my hair parting!

Ooooohhh~

The villa!

Ta-dah!!

Our own infinity pool.

*gasp* I still have my cleavage!

If you noticed, all of us – with the exception of Monkey – posed strategically to avoid revealing our erm, adorable tummies!

All of us used to swim in trunks. Now, it's in beach shorts. No prizes for correctly guessing why.

Enjoying a horrible melon martini.

OMG, my iBags!

OMG, his iBags!

The obligatory mood shot. Wahlau, this one must Photoshop.

Monkey caught sucking in his paunch.

This actually looked better on camera. Hahahah!!

Why don't I ever get this kind of lighting in my photos?

Emancipation of paopao.

The BBQ dinner in the villa.

We didn't want to leave the villa so we ate in.

Horrid composition.

Happy birthday to me!

The morning after.

It was a rainy day. No frolicking in the pool.

So up we packed.

Dreadful wait for the ferry. But it was a weekend well spent.

So there, barely a squeak. And a year older.

New Zealand 2011

2012-01-02T16:27:00.003+08:00

New Zealand. Checked!

One of the most "do nothing" trips I've had in a long time. But it's still damned tiring, as we had to move almost every night to a new hotel/motel. And the next time I'm going back to NZ South Island, I'll just visit Queenstown. Christchurch is just too… unstable.

Picking up our vehicle from the airport. Monkey thinks he's taking a Miss Universe promo shot, sheesh.

Wahlau! Oyster Bay for $17!!

The new jacket that cost a bomb. No 90% discount! WTF right?

And as we crept a little closer to examine the destruction on the cathedral, we felt the quakes. Yeah, a few of them within a span of less than 30 mins. I looked around me, expecting the ground to crack open. Luckily we were out in the open, so it didn't feel that freaky. But we still bade a quick goodbye and sped off to the next town.

The next town, Ashburton. For some reason I always wear the Nobita T-shirt for flights out of Singapore.

An Ashburlutely laid back town.

Can anyone be any more camera ready?

The only restaurant in Ashburton, we reckoned.

This is what 9pm looks like in NZ in summer.

Excellent frozen margaritas.

Salah camera.

Brekky at a deli.

One of the many discussions while on the road involved music. Like how Adele does heartbreak like no other. And how we all love Katy Perry and her Firework, but for the record we have never, EVER felt like plastic bags.

Cute cafe with a picturesque view of rolling hills!

Baaahh!

Errrmmm...

I wanna see head to toe modeling!

The water is insanely cerulean.

Possibly the ugliest pose ever.

The colours are unbelievable. And all these photos are untouched! UNTOUCHED!

Church of the Good Shepherd.

Hair flip.

Salmon farm for the freshest catch.

Going for our Christmas Eve Dinner at Mount Cook!

We wrote a postcard to friends back home and exchanged our secret Santa gifts. We played a game; the person who guessed all the secret Santas correctly will eat for free. Monkey won!

Prepping for star gazing!!

The most breathtaking experience I had on this trip. We saw 11 billion year old galaxies, Jupiter with it's cloud bands and four moons, the Orion nebula and part of the Milky Way!!! Gilbert peppered the guide's commentary with some funny shit.

guide: that's a planetary nebula, an exploding star.

gilbert: isn't that Britney Speares?

guide: and that's a birthing star.

gilbert: hello~ birthing star? Just look here... *gesturing at himself*

View of Mount Cook from the back of our dingy motel.

Clay cliffs!

Chomping on flowers.

Renne: Wah! Sibei cool! Lara Croft!

Chomping on flowers again.

A Drop of Red, a charming restaurant we stumbled on while on our way to Queenstown on Christmas Day. A drop? Lyk, seriously?

The nicest looking apartment of our trip is in Queenstown. Just look at that view!!

With a fireplace!

Looks superimposed, doesn't it? Cos it is, hahaha. Nah, joking, it's not. Muahahah, double joking, it is superimposed. OK, seriously, it's not. I swear! IT'S NOT! Why don't you believe me! Tsk!

Ronald has a knack for coming up with these erm, eccentric poses.

Queenstown.

This is probably the most number of people we encountered in New Zealand.

I used to be Snow White

But I drifted

Wahahha.

Woke up at 5.30am for a 4 hr drive to Milford Sound. Ronald was pulled over by a traffic cop for speeding, I didn't bring the car rental documents, the 3 passengers behind didn't buckle up. The cop fined us $500 for the first 2 offense, let us slide on the 3rd, would have been $950 otherwise. And we were stopped again for speeding 30 mins later! Lucky the second cop let us go after much pleading. Thereafter we kept to the speed limit.

And arrived at Milford Sound on the dot!

Milford Sound! LOTR filmed some of the scenes here!

Oh look! There's Gimli, the dwarf warrior, on the left! In red!

FYI, those are dolphins, in case you can't tell.

Seals!

Chow chow!

Sibei old school, my pose.

Not very mirror-y. Kena bluffed.

While the boys go rafting, we stayed in town and camwhored.

And jump on beds.

And stuck tissues up our noses.

And acted cool.

And looked cool.

Sng buay bin.

And then my mood lifted.

Major gek sai bin.

My curry pok coming loose at the ends.

2-9 year old boys in Queenstown wear dresses?!?

A mini costs only $29K in NZ!

While waiting for the rafting trio.

This is the closest I got to a raft.

Curry pok hair gone case!

Wah piang.

Waiting for their jetboat ride.

Jealous!

Hate them!

Lunch at Amisfield vineyard.

Best wine ever!

Best pork ever!

Best company ever!

View from our apartment in Wanaka!

Awwwww, I wish I could do that!!!

Ronald attempting a circus act...

… and looked just like a clown.

Real circus act!

Window of our apartment.

The traffic ticket.

Puzzling World, where Monkey won the race to complete the Great Maze. Another free meal for him! That's when we decided we have gotta stop playing these stupid free meal games!

我用头顶!

Lopsided room.

Everybody doing a Michael Jackson.

This room is interesting. The people on the left and right are of the same size!

Look at Monkey in red on the left (or me in white on the right).

Now look at Monkey on the right (or me on the left).

Monkey copping a feel of ancient romans!

So man!

Ducklings waddling in a line after their mommy!

Waterfall where we fed the mother of all mozzies!

The mother of all motels at Fox Glacier.

With mother of all pearl-clutching-horrendous bedsheets.

Gilbert cooking up a great meal.

Spaghetti and ravioli. Tasted better than it looked.

Skydiving duo!!! I would have signed up for it if not for my injured back!!

I Had The Attitude

They Had The Altitude….

So I Jumped

New Zealand's

Most Scenic Skydive

- Fox Glacier -

Brekky before the chopper ride.

Adrenaline junkie.

Fox Glacier!!

Protect the curry pok!

Cute sign that said:

I am very very sorry

No movies today

Our computer is sick

Medicine is almost here

Our motel sits right next to the Tasman sea at Greymouth.

Sui boh!

A very "whoa" sunset.

The colours were nothing short of amazing.

OK, me for a bit.

OK, back to the sunset.

Budding photographer => me.

Poetic is the word.

Random branch on the sand.

Strangers looking out to the horizon.

On the way to the beach, a big black hound bounded out of the bushes and started snarling at me. I did an elegant backflip to put some distance between us, sized up the beast and decided the best course of action is to scream bloody murder. Until the owners of the dog, a couple of old ladies, whistled and off he ran. Lyk, WTF.

Pancake rock at Punakaiki.

Chomping on pancakes.

The weather was crazy.

A kiwi!

TransAlpine train ride back to Christchurch.

Guess what we did on New Year's Eve?

Unlike in Egypt, here we had to help set up the hot air balloon!

Me scorching the dwarf.

With so many solo pics taken, I better be able to find a profile pic suitable for FB!!

A farmer built a lake on his estate!! How awesome is that!

We landed on the yard of the house on the left.

Girl next to Renne; fellow Singaporean we met on the balloon ride.

I think I'm a little tipsy by this time.

NYE party at Christchurch's Hagley Park.

We went to a gay club after this party-in-the-park event on NYE and erm, let's put it this way, the casino opposite the club was more interesting though I'm not a gambler.

Bidding farewell to 2011 with uncontainable enthusiasm.

What a way to end the year and welcome the next. Another great addition to our memory bank until our trip to NYC!

P.S. When I got home, what did I see sitting atop my armoire? The bloody 12-seasons-old blue jacket, of course.

*roll eyes*

Why am I not surprised.

Disappearing Act

2011-12-22T12:50:00.001+08:00

21 Nov I said I should be done packing for my trip by yesterday. That was bullshit. I'm only halfway through and I'm flying off this evening!! I haven't even gone down to the travel agency to pay the fee yet.

And I can't find my 12-seasons-old jacket!!! I is sibei tulan.

The 12-seasons-old jacket I wore to Egypt.

This jacket is very mysterious. Every time I go somewhere mildly chilly and need it the most, it pulls a disappearing act on me. Every time! Why the hide-and-seek? Especially when I only have a few hours to spare?!? TMD.

Damned, that's a freaking good photo of me.

OK, enough of the negative energy. I must be positive. I'll get a new jacket at the airport. And there'll be a 90% discount waiting for me!

New Zealand here I come!!!

30 Things to Stop Doing to Yourself

2011-12-20T22:58:00.000+08:00

I came across this article that Gilbert posted on FB. Reading it I found myself nodding in agreement, smiling with bittersweet memories and feeling rueful for committing that particular crime. The saving grace is that I'm already heeding some of the advice given. Now my aim is to start working on the others. Perhaps I should start with no. 10?

As Maria Robinson once said, “Nobody can go back and start a new beginning, but anyone can start today and make a new ending.” Nothing could be closer to the truth. But before you can begin this process of transformation you have to stop doing the things that have been holding you back.

Here are some ideas to get you started:

Stop spending time with the wrong people. – Life is too short to spend time with people who suck the happiness out of you. If someone wants you in their life, they’ll make room for you. You shouldn’t have to fight for a spot. Never, ever insist yourself to someone who continuously overlooks your worth. And remember, it’s not the people that stand by your side when you’re at your best, but the ones who stand beside you when you’re at your worst that are your true friends.
Stop running from your problems. – Face them head on. No, it won’t be easy. There is no person in the world capable of flawlessly handling every punch thrown at them. We aren’t supposed to be able to instantly solve problems. That’s not how we’re made. In fact, we’re made to get upset, sad, hurt, stumble and fall. Because that’s the whole purpose of living – to face problems, learn, adapt, and solve them over the course of time. This is what ultimately molds us into the person we become.
Stop lying to yourself. – You can lie to anyone else in the world, but you can’t lie to yourself. Our lives improve only when we take chances, and the first and most difficult chance we can take is to be honest with ourselves. Read The Road Less Traveled.
Stop putting your own needs on the back burner. – The most painful thing is losing yourself in the process of loving someone too much, and forgetting that you are special too. Yes, help others; but help yourself too. If there was ever a moment to follow your passion and do something that matters to you, that moment is now.
Stop trying to be someone you’re not. – One of the greatest challenges in life is being yourself in a world that’s trying to make you likeeveryone else. Someone will always be prettier, someone will always be smarter, someone will always be younger, but they will never be you. Don’t change so people will like you. Be yourself and the right people will love the real you.
Stop trying to hold onto the past. – You can’t start the next chapter of your life if you keep re-reading your last one.
Stop being scared to make a mistake. – Doing something and getting it wrong is at least ten times more productive than doing nothing. Every success has a trail of failures behind it, and every failure is leading towards success. You end up regretting the things you did NOT do far more than the things you did.
Stop berating yourself for old mistakes. – We may love the wrong person and cry about the wrong things, but no matter how things go wrong, one thing is for sure, mistakes help us find the person and things that are right for us. We all make mistakes, have struggles, and even regret things in our past. But you are not your mistakes, you are not your struggles, and you are here NOW with the power to shape your day and your future. Every single thing that has ever happened in your life is preparing you for a moment that is yet to come.
Stop trying to buy happiness. – Many of the things we desire are expensive. But the truth is, the things that really satisfy us are totally free – love, laughter and working on our passions.
Stop exclusively looking to others for happiness. – If you’re not happy with who you are on the inside, you won’t be happy in a long-term relationship with anyone else either. You have to create stability in your own life first before you can share it with someone else. Read Stumbling on Happiness.
Stop being idle. – Don’t think too much or you’ll create a problem that wasn’t even there in the first place. Evaluate situations and take decisive action. You cannot change what you refuse to confront. Making progress involves risk. Period! You can’t make it to second base with your foot on first.
Stop thinking you’re not ready. – Nobody ever feels 100% ready when an opportunity arises. Because most great opportunities in life force us to grow beyond our comfort zones, which means we won’t feel totally comfortable at first.
Stop getting involved in relationships for the wrong reasons. – Relationships must be chosen wisely. It’s better to be alone than to be in bad company. There’s no need to rush. If something is meant to be, it will happen – in the right time, with the right person, and for the best reason. Fall in love when you’re ready, not when you’re lonely.
Stop rejecting new relationships just because old ones didn’t work. – In life you’ll realize that there is a purpose for everyone you meet. Some will test you, some will use you and some will teach you. But most importantly, some will bring out the best in you.
Stop trying to compete against everyone else. – Don’t worry about what others doing better than you. Concentrate on beating your own records every day. Success is a battle between YOU and YOURSELF only.
Stop being jealous of others. – Jealousy is the art of counting someone else’s blessings instead of your own. Ask yourself this: “What’s something I have that everyone wants?”
Stop complaining and feeling sorry for yourself. – Life’s curveballs are thrown for a reason – to shift your path in a direction that is meant for you. You may not see or understand everything the moment it happens, and it may be tough. But reflect back on those negative curveballs thrown at you in the past. You’ll often see that eventually they led you to a better place, person, state of mind, or situation. So smile! Let everyone know that today you are a lot stronger than you were yesterday, and you will be.
Stop holding grudges. – Don’t live your life with hate in your heart. You will end up hurting yourself more than the people you hate. Forgiveness is not saying, “What you did to me is okay.” It is saying, “I’m not going to let what you did to me ruin my happiness forever.” Forgiveness is the answer… let go, find peace, liberate yourself! And remember, forgiveness is not just for other people, it’s for you too. If you must, forgive yourself, move on and try to do better next time.
Stop letting others bring you down to their level. – Refuse to lower your standards to accommodate those who refuse to raise theirs.
Stop wasting time explaining yourself to others. – Your friends don’t need it and your enemies won’t believe it anyway. Just do what you know in your heart is right.
Stop doing the same things over and over without taking a break. – The time to take a deep breath is when you don’t have time for it. If you keep doing what you’re doing, you’ll keep getting what you’re getting. Sometimes you need to distance yourself to see things clearly.
Stop overlooking the beauty of small moments. – Enjoy the little things, because one day you may look back and discover they were the big things. The best portion of your life will be the small, nameless moments you spend smiling with someone who matters to you.
Stop trying to make things perfect. – The real world doesn’t reward perfectionists, it rewards people who get things done. Read Getting Things Done.
Stop following the path of least resistance. – Life is not easy, especially when you plan on achieving something worthwhile. Don’t take the easy way out. Do something extraordinary.
Stop acting like everything is fine if it isn’t. – It’s okay to fall apart for a little while. You don’t always have to pretend to be strong, and there is no need to constantly prove that everything is going well. You shouldn’t be concerned with what other people are thinking either – cry if you need to – it’s healthy to shed your tears. The sooner you do, the sooner you will be able to smile again.
Stop blaming others for your troubles. – The extent to which you can achieve your dreams depends on the extent to which you take responsibility for your life. When you blame others for what you’re going through, you deny responsibility – you give others power over that part of your life.
Stop trying to be everything to everyone. – Doing so is impossible, and trying will only burn you out. But making one person smile CAN change the world. Maybe not the whole world, but their world. So narrow your focus.
Stop worrying so much. – Worry will not strip tomorrow of its burdens, it will strip today of its joy. One way to check if something is worth mulling over is to ask yourself this question: “Will this matter in one year’s time? Three years? Five years?” If not, then it’s not worth worrying about.
Stop focusing on what you don’t want to happen. – Focus on what you do want to happen. Positive thinking is at the forefront of every great success story. If you awake every morning with the thought that something wonderful will happen in your life today, and you pay close attention, you’ll often find that you’re right.
Stop being ungrateful. – No matter how good or bad you have it, wake up each day thankful for your life. Someone somewhere else is desperately fighting for theirs. Instead of thinking about what you’re missing, try thinking about what you have that everyone else is missing.

Here's the link if you wanna read more of other meaningful articles in the site.

小猫自传

2011-12-18T20:18:00.003+08:00

I have no idea who in my family did this but I must say my family has a peculiar sense of humour.

Photo of a kitty in a kitty frame next to 小猫's dinner plate.

Like huh?!? But it's quite cute la I admit.

And yes, our cat has a very unimaginative name of 小猫 (which translates directly to "little cat"). Intuitive? Damn right it is. Original? Over 小猫's dead carcass. We named him that because he was just a tiny kitten when he came to live with us. Don't ask me why we never considered the day when 小猫 becomes 大猫 (big cat). Clearly no one in the family had the power of foresight.

So imagine the conundrum we faced when 小猫 grew into adulthood and we adopted a second kitten. "What would we call him?" we stared puzzlingly at each other and questioned ourselves.

We ended up calling the new kitten 大猫.

Good Lord, thankfully the same thought process – or lack of – didn't go into the naming of my siblings and me, else my name would no doubt be 小人 (translates directly to "little person", which also means an unscrupulous person), my brother 大人 (adult or a magnanimous person), and my sister 女人 (woman)!

Gold Fetish and the Cat

2011-12-12T23:57:00.000+08:00

I bought that Christian Di… just kidding.

For a frugal person like me (Alex would call me a scrooge), I hardly bare to spend more than a few hundred dollars on myself at one go. I had to walk into Tod's 5 times to try on those driving shoes before convincing myself that I needed them and promptly surrendered my credit card. So it'd take a lot for me to get those CD.

On the topic of labels, mom has the most discerning taste.

mom: show me all the LV bags online. I want to buy one.
me: why always LV? Buy other labels la.
mom: like what?
me: Prada?
mom: donwan. And I bought the meow meow already. Don't like.

Meow Meow

I couldn't resist a chuckle. How adorable is meow meow?!?

So I showed her the new collection online and guess what caught her eye?

This atrocity!

This is almost akin to the proverbial saying of carrying a gold bar in your bag. Except that the gold bar on the outside in this instance.

I'm hoping it's actually more mustard than gold. Finger crossed.

Shoe Fetish

2011-12-11T21:21:00.001+08:00

What did I do on Saturday, except spent a bunch of money? Nothing. Tis the season of giving, so I gave quite a bit to whoever would take, mostly to Tod's, where I acquired my first pair of Gommino driving shoes. They were lovely. But the excitement wore off as soon as the card was swiped across the terminal.

Sui boh?!?

They come in beige too but my track record with fairer shoes has been somewhat, well, stained. And the material is similar to suede, so I was advised to keep them dry as much as possible. Hence I made the practical decision to procure the more common but definitely more reliable navy.

Now the tough part. What do I match with driving shoes?

Then at Christian Dior my eyes locked onto a pair of sneakers. My jaw dropped and saliva dribbled bounteously from my twitching lower lip.

See! Always like that. Yearning for that pair of shoes trumps finally owning it. I'm not falling into that trap again! For the 200th time! In December!

Anywayz, we traipsed around, looking for Renne's birthday pressie and my exquisite taste led me straight into the boutique above (still Christian Dior by the way). Look at these nude pumps.

These nude pumps look as erotic as they sound.

No, I do not have a shoe fetish. It's *clicks tongue and motions to Gilbert* him. He's a closet Carrie Bradshaw. And by that I meant he has a closet like hers.

Now comes the rationalising. Why the freaking hell do people spend so much on shoes? We saw the below Christian Louboutin going for $1,600+! That's more than someone's monthly salary!

You had better pray someone doesn't step on your CL and knock off a couple of studs.

They say people judge you by the shoes you wear. Look at my shoes for WHAT! Look at my face la! Am I a lesser person if my shoes do not cost upwards of $500? Would I be treat you worse if my shoes are not labeled? Of cos not. I would be an equally nasty bitch even while wearing Bata.

Rationalising completed and failed. The yearning is still there.

Cannot buy that Christian Dior. Cannot buy that Christian Dior. Cannot buy that Christian Dior. Ohmmm…

And if my next post starts with, "I bought that Christian Dior". I shall be cursed with corns and blisters till the day I die. There, I said it.

The Package

2011-12-07T21:34:00.001+08:00

It's back to work this week, which effectively meant I shortened my MC by close to 2 months. I didn't think I could bear to stay home another day. Until I had to wake up at 7.30am. Then I started missing those days when I awoke to the cooing voice of the helper inquiring what I would like to feast on for lunch, and not the insufferable blare of the phone alarm.

But it's back to work, and back to a much colder office – figuratively and literally – due to the recent re-organisation which resulted in some colleagues being offered the package.

The package consists of:

3 months' salary for the first year of employment
1 month's salary for every subsequent year of employment
December's renumeration though last day of work was 30th November
13th month bonus
Variable bonus

So if I'd gotten the package, I'd have received no less than 9 months' payout!

What I missed out on while resting at home. Godammit!

Shiok or not? Of course fucking shiok la. I can then kiao ka at home for a few more months, go on a few holidays, then slowly look for a job when I'm feeling absolutely ~~broke~~ healthy. But alas, such promising circumstances simply didn't occur.

Seriously though, how would you explain why you were let go to a potential employer? What about the dispiriting grief of knowing that you have been rendered redundant? Would you risk having an unsightly blemish on your résumé in exchange for 9 months' worth of salary? Seeing how much of an employer's market it is at the moment, coupled with the impending downturn we're expecting next year, I wouldn't be too quick to make that decision. Of course really, it wouldn't even be my decision to begin with. It wasn't as if the management asked those who wanted wads of cash to raise their hands. But even if it were, I'd definitely think more than twice before howling, "SHOW ME THE MONEY!!"

I guess what I'm saying is that though 9 months' worth of salary seemed oh-so-tantalizing, I'm more thankful to have a job than to be shoved fistfuls of cash with so much unfavourable fine prints attached. After all, the package I'm truly interested in is monetary increment as a reward for performance, not as an appreciation of years of employment.

Say What?

2011-11-30T21:25:00.001+08:00

Having never had much education, my parents impressed upon us from the time we could speak that a sound education is of utmost importance to success in life, with language being one of the most evident theme.

Unfortunately their methods weren't always right. For one, dad refused to buy us story books because he firmly believed that all there is to learn could be found in our school textbooks. And I'm talking about English being the subject of study. All those lost years of Enid Blyton, Roald Dahl and Mildred Wirt Benson. I have no childhood!

One of the constant annoyances due to the lack of knowledge of the English language for mom is that she has to remember expressway exits by their numbers rather than their names, 5 for Cairnhill Circle, 7C for Moulmein Road, etc. I can imagine what a pain that would be.

Then when we reached adolescence, dad stressed that as Hokkiens we should not sever our ties with our roots, hence the coercion to converse in our patois.

me: dear father, I would like to…

dad: stop! Speak Hokkien! Or else no pocket money!

me: pa, wa ai lui.

dad: lai gia.

me: kum sia.

And every other conversation was reverted to using the trusty Mandarin. So it's no wonder he didn't think highly of my command of the language.

dad: ler eh Hokkien ji teh ji teh, ka na sai

Which translates to, "your broken Hokkien, in bits and pieces, resembles the human waste."

No Enid? FINE! We'll see about the Hokkien!

Today another incident happened that brought to mind the crippling inconvenience – and occasionally amusing circumstances – of not being conversant with the most widely used language in the world.

mom: can you save this name into my phone contacts?

me: sure, what name?

mom: I have it written down here.

me: 猫3? What's that?

mom: catherine lor.

me: you boleh.

Hipstamatic Craze

2011-11-28T21:50:00.001+08:00

Testing Hipstamatic

No more beer! The horror!

Managed to recreate the pong tau pompadour with great success!

Crooked little finger means not cut out for violins.

Rainbow Dash, the most powerful – in my eyes – pegasus from My Little Pony, came into my possession over the weekend. Don't ask me how, I myself am equally perplexed.

him: do you know who this is?

me: YES! My Little Pony! Rainbow colour the most powerful one!

*weird stares from everyone in the room*

him: OK! I'm looking for someone to take care of her. You bring home ok?

me: errr, ok...

???

The Apple of My i

2011-11-25T21:31:00.001+08:00

Well well well. Look what Christmas pressie I got for myself. Hwahahahaha.

Hwawhahahha.

HHWAHAHAHAHHHA.

And I've been busying myself with downloading interesting apps. Like the above pics, they were taken with Hipstamatic.

For once I don't have to read another article about the "best iPhone apps of 2011" and sulk that they don't come in Blackberries.

Now now, it's not that I'm suaku, I used to have an iPhone but left it for a Blackberry cos of the free BB messenger. Now that iPhone has Whatsapp, I no longer have to pledge my allegiance to the boring BB. For a few years the only entertainment on my BB was Time Mobile. Now I have Time Mobile, Hipstamatic, SoundHound and Taxi Booking! Wahahaha.

SoundHound's response has been incredible thus far, can even recognise korean songs.

While syncing my contacts to the new smartphone, I noticed I have my own contact in my contact list. This is for some very practical reasons:

1. You should always have your own contact in your list in case you forget your number. Though that hasn't happened to me yet, you can't predict the future.

2. The best is to add a "me" in front of your name. So if you have amnesia, you'll know what your name is, provided you remember you have a phone.

3. Hopefully people who find your phone will also use this method to locate your name and mail your phone to you.

Otherwise, it's just plain silly.

So, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to play with my apps now, as well as find a song SoundHound can't recognise.

Howl's My Moving Hand?

2011-11-24T22:51:00.001+08:00

Renne asked me into her room and played the video below. This is the theme song of Jeux D'enfants, a quirky french film about two people who have been daring each other to play silly and dangerous tricks since they were kids. It's a weird film, as the dares get crazier as they grow older. The final dare culminated in them being buried in cement for true love. Siao.

Renne said I should learn how to play this song. She said it's slow and easy. But more exciting than that monotonous Kissing You.

I was nodding my head with the slow melodious tune in the beginning. I can do that, it's not so difficult.

At about the 1 min point, my eyes squinted ever so slightly as the song picked up speed. My eyes grew smaller still as the guy's hands flew faster and faster over the keyboard until I was certain he pre-recorded the song and was just pressing random keys in the video.

Blardy hell, how can someone be so good.

Then she played another video, a song from Howl's Moving Castle.

Look, he's just slapping away at the piano!

By the 1 min mark I reared my beautiful head and,

PIAK!! x 2

I double slapped Renne so hard I could see her lips twist to the right faster than the rest of her face, with a little drool flying out of her mouth.

Just kidding. But she totally deserved a slap for making me sit through that, considering that I haven't yet fully mastered my Kissing You. How insensitive.

But it's riveting to watch someone play the piano. Someone who plays it really well. Like the second guy. How I wish I were more musically gifted. Being able to belt out Whitney and Mariah's repertoire is about all the talent I have. If only I could play an instrument too...

Tuba not counted.

White Girl Problems

2011-11-23T20:50:00.001+08:00

I've been following @whitegrlproblem ever since Time magazine named her as one of the 140 best twitter feeds earlier this year. And boy, is she funny.

Some of her funnier tweets:

whitegrlproblem Will suck dick for Birkin.

whitegrlproblem I'm 1.5 mimosas away from giving my phone number to a waiter.

whitegrlproblem I think my voice sounds fat.

whitegrlproblem Do not bring your chocolate croissant and your bullshit attitude around me.

whitegrlproblem Remember when I used to like you and we were totally best friends? Me neither.

whitegrlproblem Thanks for giving me my first eating disorder, Barbie.

whitegrlproblem I love how you think that's vintage.

whitegrlproblem They tried to make me go to rehab and I said, "Chic, when's my flight?"

whitegrlproblem Congrats to my 500,000th follower @AmyTemplin! I'm sending her a signed copy of my book. She only has six followers…sad. Hope this helps!

Today I chanced upon one of her tweets where she put a link to her soon-to-be-released memoir. She 'leaked' 2 chapters of the book that's due to come out in Jan. Her tweets may be humorous but this, is the real LOL funny stuff. Go knock yourself out.

Can't wait for the book!

The Nano-er

2011-11-22T21:44:00.001+08:00

Wahh vri cute, but what could it be?

Below is my iPod nano. The 2nd generation red iPod nano which went missing for a couple of years and recently rediscovered, hidden underneath a pile of curlers on some random shelf in Renne's room. That witch, she robbed me of 8GB of audio pleasure for two whole years. What did I do to her?

This is a relic.

So Apple was offering complimentary engraving services on the back of the iPod then. Of course I had to use the service; I'm Singaporean. Did you see I said "complimentary"? This word excites the average Singaporean more than the word "free". Because "complimentary" sounds less cheap. OK, technically that didn't even make sense since "free" and "complimentary" both mean without charge, so one couldn't be cheaper than the other. But you know what I mean.

For some reason which I shall elaborate later, I chose to engrave the following:

9XXXXXXX

pls return me

Corny, but I had my reasons.

There. Proof.

Not able to fully spell "please" out due to limitation on the number of characters.

Apparently complimentary doesn't mean you can write a poem!

The rationale is that the good samaritan who finds my iPod will give me a ring to say that he/she found my iPod and would like to return it to me, especially after seeing that pleading tone of voice.

If the good samaritan turns out to be an idiot, those words were meant to shame the finder when his/her friend sees him/her using someone else's iPod.

But of course if it fell into the hands of a family member, it may end up sitting underneath some curlers in your house for two years. Engraved or not, those words didn't matter.

I must admit that I'm not one to follow the progression of anything remotely electronic, even from Apple. So I naturally assumed that this tiny music player was a shuffle when I caught sight of it recently.

Except that it's not, it's a 6th generation iPod nano!
This thing is nano-er than the first iPod shuffle I had.

My iPod nano looks positively gigantic next to this newborn. But seriously, who needs a music player when our phones can do that? So I guess at $200+ (for the 16GB model) a pop, it's a steal compared to the $480+ I paid for my 8GB iPod nano. Taking inflation into account, that's effectively $600 more!

Hence the scowl on my face right now.

All monetary figures are in SGD unless otherwise stated.

New Zealand Trip Planning

2011-11-21T22:54:00.001+08:00

Fox Glacier snow landing

Exactly a month from now, I should be almost done packing my luggage for New Zealand. As the organizer of the trip, I've completed the booking of all the activities for the entire traveling party. Efficient much.

Highlights of the trip:

Hot air balloon over Canterbury Plains
Helicopter ride over Fox Glacier
Scenic cruise at Milford Sound
Rafting and jet boat ride at Kawarau river
Skydiving from 12K feet

Due to my injury, I'm not participating in the last two high risk activities. As you can see, those that I can partake in are mostly of the scenic nature. So I better not get a sore eye then. I'll fucking kill myself if that happens.

The final two activities will take place in Queenstown, the land of adrenaline rush. But I'm afraid the only rush I'll feel is when I remember mid-way through the trip that I forgot to set an out of office reminder. I'll get a cardiac arrest for that.

So while researching for our trip, we tried looking up gay bars and pubs for our New Year's Eve countdown in Christchurch. NONE! DON'T HAVE! CANNOT FIND! IL N'Y A PAS! For a land this size, it's unfathomable that NZ's South Island is devoid of gays! You'd have thought they gotta at least cater to tourists right? But nooooo… so our conclusion is that gays don't do New Zealand, period.

That day Gil popped a question during my NZ powerpoint/excel presentation. I know him, he just wanted to test if I prepped my homework well.

gil: what's the predominant religion of NZ?

me: Christchurch has christ and church in its name. You guess?

Wahahahaha! I win!!

So what's in it for me with all the planning? Ignoring the fact that I'm the only person free enough to do all these, I get to earn points on my card by paying for them first!! But, mostly it's because I'm free.

The Tree of Life

2011-11-21T14:27:00.001+08:00

I put off watching this movie for quite a while because of the first 20 minutes. It was boring untillllll……zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz. Not to mention confusing cos the story was told in a non-linear narrative. Never one to give up on any of Brad's movies, I gave it another shot. And thank god I did!

Shortly after the 20 minute mark, the film switched from the story of a family with a difficult father to telling how the universe, and subsequently the Earth, was formed. This was followed by the formation of life and the film even showed the asteroid collision with Earth that ended the reign of the dinosaurs. Beautiful!

Throughout this segment of the film, a voice asked some existential questions. To which I pondered and asked my own, "why do these questions exist?"

Towards the second half of the movie, another segment showed Earth far into the future, how it was devoured by the Sun when it turned into a red giant and finally mellowed down into a white dwarf. Breathtaking.

All these apparently without the use of CGI! Amazing!

I shan't go into details except to say that the story of the family was well told. My twenty cents worth (inflation honey) is that I felt like the movie was comparing life in its macro and micro forms. In theory, the combination of these 2 different worlds seemed like a mismatch. Yet to me, the film wouldn't have worked as well if either story was left out. This is, perhaps, what is so fascinating about this movie.

Blog Stats

2011-11-20T20:39:00.001+08:00

Aside from the new blog templates, Blogger introduced some nifty features that are really interesting. Take the blog statistics for instance, they show you various info about the blog traffic, most read post and even where the readers hail from.

They tell you what the traffic has been since the inception of my blog. The period with the most number of visits happened in Q1 this year. I have no freaking idea why.

Close to 14K views for the Mario Brothers entry!! That's almost a third of all the page views for my blog! Those poor things. They must have thought I was blogging about the Nintendo plumber brothers, only to realise it was just me fawning over Mario Maurer. Hah!

I find this the most interesting stat. Of course bulk of the views from Singapore comes from yours truly, since I'm obsessed with reading my own entries to check for spelling/grammatical errors. Yeah, I'm anal that way. And some other ways too but let's not get distracted.

Now, there're 8.5K views from the Philippines. I'm intrigued. I wonder if any of you look like those delectable guys I saw in Boracay. Hah.

That's it. Kthnxbye.

Archive III: Dynamic Views

2011-11-20T20:07:00.001+08:00

Check out Blogger's new dynamic views. Cool right! As a reader you even get to pick which view you prefer from the bar just below the blog title.

All of the views look great, especially when there are pictures, which made the whole page look a hell lot more interesting than it really is, hah!

New blog mantra; less copy, more visuals.

Pompadour

2011-11-16T19:47:00.001+08:00

Check out my new hairdo.

I'm very satisfied with it because I've always wanted to sweep my lustrous hair back in a pompadour but my previous hairstylist said my hair is too straight and flat.

The downside is that this requires plenty of blow drying, something I hardly ever do. As well as the use of generous amounts of products; sea salt spray, sculpting lotion and super hard hairspray.

Therefore I've decided to take some pics of this look because I have this sickening feeling that I probably won't be able to recreate this look if left to my own devices.

The Imaginarium of Doctor Similan

2011-11-15T00:24:00.001+08:00

I saw this movie sometime back with Alex. We stepped out of the theatre with question marks above our heads. "Similan was that" aptly described our review of the show.

I wanted to watch it because the trailer looked so fascinating.

One interesting fact about the movie is that because Heath Ledger passed away while the movie was filming, three of his good friends, Johnny Depp, Jude Law and Colin Farrell stepped in to complete the movie. They are such great ~~eye candy~~ actors I simply couldn't miss this movie.

Even though I didn't fully comprehend the movie, to this date I'm still very much intrigued by it. I just know that the movie is packed with symbolism and I'm keen to unravel them. In fact, it seemed as if every scene is teeming with meaningful metaphors. I just haven't been able to find a website that analyzed the movie to such detail.

Alex, on the other hand, formed his – rather fallacious if I may say so myself – opinion even before the movie ended; never trust my taste in movies in future :(

Practice Makes Perfect

2011-11-13T16:02:00.001+08:00

I've been practicing on the piano everyday. I think I put in more hours these few weeks combined than those 3 years when I was taking lessons. Totally on my way to become a concert pianist.

So I'm proud to say that my Kissing You is sounding pretty awesome. Awesome to me, that is. It still sounds a little clumsy to others, more like Slobbering Over You, I reckon. Wahahahaha.

Fixed piano with ~~shit~~ sheet music for Slobbering Over You.

Can't wait for Adele's sheet music to arrive!!

Going New Places

2011-11-12T01:01:00.001+08:00

I'm giddy with excitement now. Because I've just booked myself on another trip next year. It may be a little early to be rejoicing now but I can hardly contain my joy. It's a new place each year! This year end's trip is to New Zealand. Next September I'll be jetting off to New York City! Kiasu mucho (hey look, I'm trilingual)!

I know, I know, I'm sick when this is the first image that comes to my mind when I think of NYC. Blame it on western influence.

Today was a semi-excuse for me to meet up with my friends for a faux-catch-up session (so I can drink) on the final details of our NZ trip and to discuss about our next trips. On the agenda was my plan to luxuriate at Banyan Tree Bintan for my birthday and our NYC trip next fall.

I've decided one night at Banyan is good enough since it's the coming weekend after our return from NZ and I probably can't be on leave. So we're all set for that. As for NYC, I've been dreaming about this trip for months, incidentally with the group that's going to NZ and today we just decided to go ahead and click the "confirm your seat" button.

I must say, I never felt so good spending so much moolah. I feel the pinch when I spend money on a pair of shoes or a top (the inanimate kind) but when it comes to travel, it's like the decimal point shifts leftwards, I swear!

The only problem now is…

How in the world am I going to squeeze my India trip in 2012?!?

Piano Pains

2011-11-10T00:48:00.000+08:00

I am so fucked.

Remember I was contemplating if I should get a piano tuner to come fix the disaster of a piano I have or simply buy a new keyboard and I ended up declaring that I'll pick up drawing instead? Well, even I didn't believe that for a millionth of a second.

In the end I got a tuner to come over and figured that if the repair cost got too much, I'll simply leave the piano to rot in silence. The total repair cost exploded into seven friggin hundred dollars and what did I say? I said YES. This is definitely one of those times when I've been far more idealistic than I probably should have been.

Now that it's fixed, I'm caught in a fix. It's not that I'm hesitating to put in time and effort to play the instrument, it's that I don't know what to play.

1. Download free sheet music

Easier said than done. Most websites provide sheet music of pop songs that were "composed" by netizens, so they're not the real deal. Some that I managed to download require a special software to read and that special software comes with a special price of US$300. Fuck me.

2. Buy sheet music

I was going to buy Adele's sheet music until I saw a sample page.

You don't even have to enlarge the picture to see that there're way too many tau ges on that page than I can chew. After all, I stopped learning after grade 3… 20 years ago...

How about I just buy sheet music that's suited for my level? Then I'm left with songs like these.

The Girl from Ipanema? Seriously?

What I really want though is to play Chinese pop music, especially those with lotsof (easy) piano solos in it. But I don't think they even sell those.

3. Perfect the song that inspired me to pick up piano again

Sheet music for Kissing You.

I know this song looks way harder than Adele's. But I "made it my own" by playing some bits really slowly, ignoring other bits, and humming the rest of it. I think I got it covered.

While typing this entry I just purchased a couple of sheet music books online, including the Adele one.

Frankly speaking I'm a little amazed by my spontaneity. But I kind of like that. Pragmatism is overrated. Life's really about these little unexpected, unplanned moments. Do something different, break the monotony. These are the things that you'll carry in your memory far into the future. Sometimes you gotta just go for it, don't rationalise so much, you know? Live life to the fullest! That's right! Make an impulse online purchase today!

Discovering Me

2011-11-02T00:33:00.002+08:00

While resting at home these 2 months, I've had much time on my hands and I got to learn more about myself. And I thought I was the expert in that subject.

I learnt that I don't gain weight when I don't gym. Ta-dah!!! I always thought that my waist will balloon since I've been pudgy before, and especially when I'm so sedentary now. Not so; I'm like a stick now. So I've resigned to be the archetypical twink.

Sadly the first place to show is my face. Hollow cheeks and cheekbones so pronounced that they can slice the air wouldn't be too far off a description for my newly gaunt, model-esque features. The saving grace though would be that my complexion has improved from a sickly green to a healthy yellow. Long way to pink but green to yellow sounds pretty awesome to me now.

I discovered that I'm rather good at planning stuff. I have this New Zealand trip coming up in end Dec and I still have every intention of making it there, excruciating pain or not. I did a powerpoint presentation that visually presents what the traveling party can expect from the trip and an excel spreadsheet that automatically calculates each person's expected expenditure based on the activities he/she chooses to do. I even planned out each day's itinerary, time and distance from each town to the other, as well as map out the entire journey, right down to the petrol consumption, etc. See some of the slides below.

Boliao right? Everyone thought so too initially. But they eventually came around. I was looking forward to waking up each day so I could tweak them to bring them ever so closer to perfection. Now that it's done and done, my days are back to nothingness.

Another thing I learnt is that I'm full of shit. OK, I knew this before but I didn't know I had so much of it in me. Figuratively, mind you.

I spent the first 10 months of the year telling myself I would really, really like to spend my 30th birthday without any fanfare. In fact, I've been planning for a me-only-day for the longest time, starting with a solitary drink at the Pavilion at Beaufort (solitary refers to me, not the drink. No way am I traveling 25km for one drink), followed by a quiet dinner at La Strada (which I planned for this year but didn't happen cos Alex & Gilbert held a party for me, for which I am forever grateful cos I wasn't ready to be so alone just yet), and ending the day at the Science Centre for a night of breathtaking stargazing.

10 full months of this. Then last night I thought, fuck it, I'm only gonna be 30 once. And what if I drank too much at the Pavilion? Or what if I got self conscious at dinner with other diners staring at me wondering if I've been stood up by a date? Or if I eventually deem Science Centre to be too far and a hassle to commute?

So now it's a toss between this and this.

A luxurious stay at the Banyan Tree Bintan

A relaxing yacht party with my friends

I really, really want the Banyan Tree stay but the yacht seems more likely now cos Banyan's villas are all snapped up on one of the nights I plan to be there. No point staying for just one night I feel.

Ultimately I may just choose to reward myself with a shopping spree. I dunno yet but I sure have time to contemplate. We'll see…

The Moron

2011-10-25T16:07:00.001+08:00

I'm sure most people would have heard about Yueyue's case by now; that 2 year-old girl who was ran over by 2 vans while 18 passers-by walked on without lending a helping hand. Terrible, this news.

As horrible as this piece of news is, I also find it uncomfortable when people use this as another example to blast the country and its citizens. I've seen people state on FB that their hatred for the Chinese people has intensified due to this incident. Why so much hate for China and its people? Why so much hate at all? How can one extrapolate the actions, or non-action, of 18 Chinese people to the entire population?

Anyhow, I know there are people who think otherwise and that this debate will probably go on forever. This post is not so much about me proclaiming my stance on this tragedy, it's more on one particularly moronic comment that someone posted in response to an article about this case.

Check out what Hayden Here said,

it's okay.. chinese still cook good food! :)

It is as funny as it is inappropriate.

Mad TV

2011-10-24T12:29:00.000+08:00

I spent Saturday watching YouTube for 11 hours straight. Sport stacking, domino competitions, Mad TV, you name it.

I wanna talk about Mad TV. Though Mad TV's really addictive, spending that much time mindlessly clicking through its crazy sketches can drain anyone's humour. However, I caught this sketch late in the night and found it absolutely hilarious. Debra Wilson is a genius. She's also known for her impressions of Oprah, Whitney and Beyoncé. She cracks me up every time, definitely one of my favourites on Mad TV.

This is the one that gave me stitches.

This is one of her Oprah impressions. Embedding was disabled.

While Away

2011-10-18T21:28:00.008+08:00

So I finally found the sheet music for Kissing You by Des'ree, that song from Baz Lurhmann's Romeo + Juliet that played when both protagonists were gazing at each other through that saltwater fish tank between the restrooms. You know that scene. Everyone does. This one.

I lurrrrrve this song. It's my theme song for all of my romantic relationships. It's that good.

Beyoncé did a cover of this song in 2007. I threw up all over my laptop while watching it on YouTube, I much prefer Des'ree's version (but I still love you Beyoncé, muacks!). Besides, I think it's cool to have an apostrophe in your name. Hmmmm, so does having an accent aigu, but I digress.

Anyway, now that I've got so much time on my hands, I was thinking maybe I could learn how to play this song on the piano. How excited I was!

Regrettably, my piano hasn't been tuned in over 20 years. So all the keys have sort of hardened and some lost their elasticity, such that they remained in the 'down' position even when released, à la rigor mortis. Can't blame it. I'd have gone wonky too if nobody touched me for 20 years.

However, I persisted, and spent a good 30 mins on the piano. I found that if I played really, really, really slowly, I can almost make out the melody. It's really quite amazing that the pressing of seemingly random keys will produce such beautiful chords. So I concluded that today's a success. But due to the constant pressing of stubborn keys, and having to push some inelastic ones back to the 'up' position, my fingers are hurting.

I did some research. I have 2 options. I can either get a professional to restore the piano or I can buy a portable keyboard piano. Either option will set me back a few hundred dollars, to learn how to play one song, which may or may not be successful given the length of time that I have lost touch with the instrument.

So I decided, I shall pick up drawing instead.

Korean Craze

2011-10-17T15:23:00.001+08:00

I've been following this cute korean drama series called Secret Garden. It's damn good! And I'm not even done watching it yet. As with many other korean shows, this one has a very touching theme song, 那个女人. Super cham, the tune and lyrics.

Interestingly, there's a male version, 那个男人, sung by the male lead Hyun Bin, who's quite a dish.

I like it so much that I intended to memorise the lyrics so I can sing it. Then I saw the romanized lyrics.

Geuraeseo geu yeojaneun geudael

Neol sarang haetdaeyo ttokgataseo

Tto hanagateun babo tto hanagateun babo

Hanbeon nareul anajugo gamyeon an dwaeyo

WTF. How to pronounce?

Then I discovered that spring onion sang a mandarin version.

Yay me. I have to say that the korean version is way nicer. But you saw the lyrics, gotta make do with the mandarin version.

All these bring to mind one of my all time favourite korean songs, Byul, from 200 Pounds Beauty.

Sadly, I can't find a mandarin version for this song, though I did come across an english cover some netizens recorded and posted on YouTube. I hurriedly listened to it and promptly threw up all over myself. They totally massacred the song. No choice, this one gotta learn in korean.

The Real Damage

2011-10-14T13:34:00.001+08:00

See see see my scar, gross right! Ackkk!

They say it's a clean looking wound.

Note the swelling. And they're gonna slice the exact same spot 2 years from now. Well, I hope it's the exact same spot. I don't think I can handle 2 scars on my back.

Stretched up to half of my back. Fucking long. Please ignore the disposable underwear.

As much as I'm not looking forward to the second operation, I do want it to be over asap. Can't wait to put all these behind me, or more accurately, take out all those behind me. Hahaha.

Nip/Tuck?

2011-10-13T18:16:00.004+08:00

I was randomly surfing the web and I came across an article on Angelababy. She's this incredibly doll-like pretty young lady who hails from the land of the siew ngor. Get it? That's roasted pigeon. Did I get it right? Fuck it. It's Hong Kong.

This is Angelababy.

Then I chanced upon someone's blog blasting her for having multiple plastic surgeries done. The blogger said he was disgusted and that nature is beauty. Angelababy, like any rational celeb, denied having any work done.

That set me thinking. What's my take on plastic surgery?

Personally, I think plastic surgery is perfectly fine. Come on, you have to give someone credit for wanting a chance at a better life, and for having the guts to go through a procedure that painful. I say "a chance at a better life" and not "a better life" because I think we can all agree that being good looking doesn't necessarily mean one's happier. But there's definitely a higher chance, right? So yeah, hats off to those who dare to go under the knife.

If I could, I'd choose to have plastic surgeries done. Lower my hairline, shave my jawline to sharpen my chin, correct my crooked nose, reduce my upper lip, remove my eye bags, implant a moustache and sideburns, etc. So why don't I? Cos I'm scared of pain. And it's expensive. And the down time is way too long. And some procedures are not even stable yet. But one day, maybe one day...

My issue with plastic surgery comes when it does the opposite of what it's supposed to achieve. Or having so much work done that one looks like a freak of nature which, incidentally, is still nature. Hahahah.

So the blogger said nature is beauty, that there's certainly no need to resort to such drastic measures since make up can do the job and he's perfectly fine with using make up to beautify oneself. Errrrr, okayyyyy, smartass.

I do agree that nature is beauty, and that's precisely the point of plastic surgery. No one wants unnatural looking double eyelids, eh?

I do see the irony of using unnatural means to achieve naturally good looks but hey, c'est la vie. If you ain't got it and you want it, …

So, I say, let's be less judgmental on those who've had work done. Whether Angelababy has had any is really none of my concern. But I'd like to think that she has, because I'm curious who her doctor is!

The Mini (er)

2011-10-13T10:29:00.003+08:00

Yesterday I went down to the workshop and finally got to see the damage. Frankly I was shocked. The mini was really battered. I didn't know it was this bad cos I lost consciousness briefly after the impact and only caught a glimpse of the side when I stumbled out of the wreckage. But being highly disoriented, I couldn't ascertain the full extent of the damage… until yesterday.

Chui!

This is the side I glimpsed, looked pretty bad, I thought.

Until I saw this side, that is.

Both airbags out.

Come to think of it, this car's really sturdy. Note that the damage didn't extend beyond the bonnet. Even the windscreen's intact.

Verdict: the mini's gotta go after the repair. What a pity. And I feel bad for Renne, cos I just robbed her of the convenience of her own car for a few months. Hope she'll get a new one quick.

P.S. My boss joked that my Mini has turned into a Suzuki Swift. (- . -")

FaceBook Cleanup

2011-10-09T15:32:00.000+08:00

Today is FaceBook cleanup day. It's time to go through that list of 300 odd folks who have requested to add me but I either:

have no clue who they are OR
wasn't interested in adding them to my friend list then

I typically go through this list once every few months just to see if I'll suddenly remember who a person was and true enough, I do and end up adding a few people each time. Today I added about 10 people.

Then I went through my current friend list and decided to kick friends who aren't really friends off my list. I used to add people if we have more than 20 common friends, rationalising that I could have forgotten who this person was but since we have so many common friends, I must have been introduced to them at some point. Now the rule is that I must have at least interacted with this person before he/she can stay on the list. Or he is super duper cute. Or we have more than 100 common friends. Cos then it'd definitely be my memory that's at fault.

Gosh, I've already deleted 20 people before 'D' is through. No wonder I have 500+ friends.

Working on it...

Still working on it...

Done! Struck off 62 people! Yeah!!

P.S. SMR, which one is you? I think I accidentally deleted your account. Haha.

A Letter to Myself

2011-10-08T22:34:00.081+08:00

I found this picture last night. While staring at my younger self I feel this urge to tell this innocent child about the trials and tribulations that he will be facing in life. Consider it a letter to myself, an idea I got from a friend's blog but certainly worth recreating.

Life will be kind to you. Though you may not be born with a silver spoon in your mouth, life isn't difficult by most standards. Being the eldest son of the eldest son, you will be the centre of attention of the family. But there will also be tremendous pressure to set a good example for many others. You will be expected to walk the right path, make the right decisions, and there will be no room for derailment.

When you are seven, you will come in first in class. You will be rewarded with a S$100 Lego set which, in today's value, amounts to S$100,000. Your parents will mistake you for a child prodigy and since both never graduated from primary school, you will be pushed to achieve what they never did. You will convince yourself to live up to their expectations and will try to be the best student, you will even take up piano lessons. You will never again come in first and you will abhor piano teachers for a long time to come but things will still go fairly well. Until you're 13.

One day when you are out with a few friends, a girlfriend will laugh at you for always wearing those Mickey Mouse t-shirts that Mom will buy in abundance. From that day onwards, you will swear to never ever wear a Disney t-shirt out until you are 20 when Disney came back in fashion and you will sport a cool Donald Duck singlet. And don't listen to that guy friend who will say that shiny silver JPG sling bag is nice because it's ugly as fuck. And toe socks with slippers will NEVER be cool.

At 13, you will encounter your first turning point in life, you will come to realise that you are a little different from the other boys. Don't read Teens or Teenage magazines, and don't even get me started on Lime. Because Aunt Agony always gives you shitty advice on how to cope with your sexual orientation. She will tell you it's a phase. You will wait out your teenage years telling yourself that this phase may pass until you finally throw in the towel at age 19 – that's the upper age limit of this phase that Aunt Agony told you about – and tell yourself that what you really should be concerned with is your face. Because honey, you're gay.

The rigours of army life will motivate you to pick up where you left off in school, when the realization of your sexual orientation set you back in your studies. You will tell yourself that your sole purpose in life at this point will be to excel in your studies. After all, what else should you be good at as a student if not that. Your advice will serve you well and you will graduate with commendable grades.

Living by the rules may appear to give you the authority to criticise many, including your siblings because by comparison, their lives will not seem as straightforward as yours. But get off your high horse. It may take a while to acknowledge that you shouldn't judge others based on how you live your life but you'll get there.

But living by the rules all your life will start to take its toll. As much as you try to follow the conventional route, you will inevitably pick up some vices. Drinking will be a problem. Treading that conventional path will be so exhausting that you will keep wanting to do stupid things that will inadvertently upset the people closest to you. You will eventually want to evaluate and do what is right for yourself, not for others. So for god's sake, lose that rebellious streak cos you're just not cut out to be a rebel. Or at least, rebel for the right reason.

You will have 4 boyfriends before you reach the age of 30. For the first two relationships you will be nonchalant – a term he will actually use on you – to him. You will not even know at which point you will fall in love with him. But your second boyfriend will teach you how to turn into an unreasonable bitch when the occasion calls for it (or not). You will remember this valuable lesson for life. At the start of the other two relationships you will tell yourself to hold back your emotions for fear of getting hurt. But very soon your heart will trump your logic and you will fall in love faster than he can say "I love you". You will finally learn that giving your all and expecting little or vice versa may not be the best formula for a healthy relationship. I hope that you will find a balance soon. Maybe you are not ready to be in a relationship or maybe you haven't met the right one yet. I still don't have an answer now but I pray that one day I will.

When you are at the cusp of your 30th birthday you will meet with an accident that will require you to go through a major surgery. You will blame yourself for it but everything happens for a reason. This, I reckon, will be another turning point in your life.

You will battle with a few bouts of depression over the course of your life. But if you keep your vices in check, you will understand that your sunny disposition on life will light up the darkest corners. So while you are recuperating at home from the surgery, suck it up and tell yourself that this pain will be but a distant memory sooner than you think. And you will emerge as a stronger person than ever before.

The Beginning of Infinity

2011-10-08T15:46:00.003+08:00

This video is inspired, in part, by the ideas explored in David Deutsch's new book, The Beginning of Infinity.

Amazing video. This is going into my books-to-buy list.

THE BEGINNING OF INFINITY from jason silva on Vimeo.

Wee Wise Words

2011-10-08T15:31:00.003+08:00

Cute animations that were aired on BBC.

Wee Wise Words - Money from Flickerpix on Vimeo.

Wee Wise Words - Olden days from Flickerpix on Vimeo.

Wee Wise Words - Heaven and Hell from Flickerpix on Vimeo.

Steve Jobs

2011-10-06T17:36:00.002+08:00

Today I woke up, roused my MacBook from sleep mode, clicked on Safari and there it is, Steve Jobs staring right into my face. Without reading any of the text, the first thing that came to my mind was that he has passed away.

A click on the page brought forth a eulogy.

Apple is so cool that even the page commemorating Jobs looks cool and chic. I wouldn't say this comes as a surprise since Apple announced it's new CEO a few months back. That ought to be a little hint about Jobs' health condition. But it is still jarring to learn that someone so immensely talented has passed on.

One technicality I'm intrigued about is how Apple intends to manage the millions and millions of emails that will be flooding their rememberingsteve@apple.com mailbox?

If it's any consolation for Apple, I've decided to switch back to iPhone. Yes Apple, you're getting a re-convert, I'm getting the new iPhone 4S. And this is not because of Jobs' passing, it's because I saw what this new gadget can do on the Apple website and my contract renewal is up in a few days' time. Peace.

Your time is limited, so don't waste it living someone else's life.

Don't be trapped by dogma, which is living with the results of other people's thinking. Don't let the noise of others' opinions drown out your own inner voice.

And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition.

They somehow already know what you truly want to become.

Everything else is secondary.

-- Steve Jobs, 2005

Screw It

2011-10-05T20:18:00.008+08:00

OMG, check out what I have inside of me! Yikes!!

Front view. A piece of me now, or rather, 10 more pieces of me now: 8 screws and 2 rods.

Side view. The arrow points to the fracture.

Now, the metal detector's gonna sound every time I pass through one. Sounds cool, but I'd rather not have that if I could, thankyouverymuch.

And this shit's gonna stay in me for up to 2 years. Then I'm going to go through the very painful process of opening up my back again to remove the intruders. Utterly unpleasant, this whole affair. But hey, it's already in, can't really do much at this point except bitch about it. So bear with me.

By the way, who says you can't get visitors when you're convalescing at home? I was peeved when a friend who learnt that I was going to be discharged the following day texted me, "Was planning to visit you in the hospital but guess there's no need now. Cya in a month's time." This, despite knowing that I'm going to be at home at least a month to recuperate. Not that I'm hard up for visitors but I'd rather you not say you were planning to visit and then dumping me this 'since you're home I'm sure you're not dying' logic, I'd rather you not say anything at all. That was really insensitive. And just so you know, the doctor just extended my MC till 31 Jan 2012. Yeah, next year! As of now I'm already bored out of my fucking mind, can't imagine another 4 more months of this. Sianz.

Never thought I'd say this, but I can't wait to get back to the office...

Pain Pain

2011-09-27T12:45:00.002+08:00

This has got to be one of the more miserable times of my life. I certainly didn't expect the surgery to take so much out of me. Aside from the dearth of activities that I'm able to participate in the coming months as mentioned earlier, there're also bothersome situations I'm forced into daily.

I'm in constant pain. 24/7 pain. Pain that's only alleviated ever-so-slightly by powerful painkillers. These painkillers are so potent that I could slip into a coma should I ever decide to down it with a wee bit of alcohol, so says the pharmacist.

Because of the pain, I can't lie straight on on my back. I've only began to sit up for longer than the time taken for a meal these 2 days and it beats lying down in bed the whole day. Not being able to lie straight meant that I have to sleep on my sides every night. I slept on my sides so much that my pelvis is starting to hurt. I didn't even know that was possible.

The painkillers are last taken at 7pm. So by the time they wear off, my back and sides start to hurt and I start waking up in the middle of the night several times trying to find the least painful position to sleep. Until 8am when I can't take it anymore, I wake up, quickly have breakfast so I can take more painkillers!

If it sounds like I'm whining, that's because I am! This sucks! I want this pain to go away! And don't even think about coming back another day!

Moves Like Jagger

2011-09-26T19:49:00.002+08:00

This is some catchy shit!

Boredom

2011-09-23T10:19:00.008+08:00

So I'm still stuck in the hospital and it's coming to 2 weeks now. Thank goodness I'm not groggy from the morphine anymore, so I started catching up on some Korean drama (a sign of true boredom for yours truly). This one came highly recommended by Renne and Wayne.

See, I'm someone who (mostly) love kids but sometimes, there'll come along this one kid that you want to punch the hell out of. Below is one of those. It may seem childish but I had to pause the video when a nurse came into the ward and this is what I got.

“我不想问什么，我只想揍你的脸。”
＊必须＊

Anyway what I'm trying to say in that I'm not a monster who tortures kids; I'm saying that this kid is a great actor since his character is rather annoying… and that I can be amused easily… because I'm fucking bored.

The Surgery

2011-09-18T11:50:00.003+08:00

I've been lying in the hospital for a week now. And it's getting fucking boring. That's not even the worst part, cos I'll most probably need to lie here for another week before I get to go home and lie there for a month. This sucks. All because I have to go for a *灯灯灯等* spinal instrumentation surgery, which is essentially putting some screws and a couple of metal rods to stabilise my lumbar spine so it could heal.

What this also means is that I'm gonna suffer from a stiff back for a year to a year-and-a-half from now before I can go through another procedure to remove the intruding metalwork. There goes my flawless v-shaped back.

Another downer is that I won't be able to go bungee jumping, white water rafting, sky diving or jet boating in New Zealand cos these will cause undue axial stress on my spinal column. Dammit, I was really looking forward to the white water rafting and jet boating. So this sucks.

In the greater scheme of things though, this is a small price to pay for a fractured L4 vertebrae, which could potentially lead to paralysis. I'm acting like it's ok but I'm really scared shitless. And I'm still counting my lucky stars.

The Accident

2011-09-13T22:06:00.004+08:00

I believe I'm not meant to enjoy princess day because very soon after, every effort I made on princess day to primp myself was reversed. Yeap, you guessed it, I got involved in a car accident. I'm typing this from my ward and I'm thankful they have wi-fi here, almost as thankful as when they saved me from the wreck I dare say.

OK, seriously, I'm thankful that only cars, not pedestrians, were involved; that the passengers in the other cars were OK; that alcohol didn't play a part; that I suffered only superficial injuries and am the only person warded; that it can be classified as a serious-minor accident: serious enough to warrant a hospital stay, yet minor enough that nobody was severely harmed.

In essence, all the things that matter are fine. I'm counting my lucky stars. Pao's card read, "You got an experience, you will never need it again. Congrats - Get Well Soon". I with you on this one, Pao.

Wassup

2011-09-10T14:11:00.004+08:00

Being a princess is exhausting. Yesterday was princess day – quoted from a friend – and it wasn't fun. Look at the schedule,

9am: Health screening

12pm: Haircut

2pm: Aesthetician

3pm: Orthodontist

4pm: Brow threading

I'm only lacking a mani/pedi and spa treatment to complete princess day. And my aesthetician totally spoiled my day. He threw in an FOC chemical peel and conveniently burnt my face and since it's free, I can't really say anything, can I? I is sibei tulan.

Backtrack to Thursday. Once again, Monkey proved to be the most inadequate gym buddy.

me: my lady friends, are we going to the gymnasium this evening?

pinoy: *so lazy he didn't even reply*

monkey: yes

me: sian

monkey: ok then we go check out this other gym.
me: huh~ ok

See how disruptive Monkey is to my gym routine?!? Skipping one gym to see another is the ultimate irony. Monkey has certainly outdone itself in this instance.

So today Monkey and I went to sign up for PT. I felt so incredibly motivated that I wanted to speed to Cali for a back-breaking workout since the course effectively starts next week. Then I thought better of it, knowing that I'd be going through some tough shit in the next 3 months so I figured I better give myself a break first, and to rehydrate with you-know-what.

Excerpt of the conversation we had with a trainer,

trainer: so what do you usually have for dinner?

monkey: sometimes noodles, sometimes rice.

trainer: how about on the whole, which do you have more.

monkey: hmmmm, I like noodles better.

trainer: ok, noodles it is.

monkey: wait! do you mean weekend or weekday? I mean err, sometimes I eat different things during the weekend.

This is not a bloody interview! Just give a generic answer! The whole time I was rolling my eyes while trying to contain my giggles. Monkey is such a character.

Anywayz, I hope I'd still be as motivated next week if not more, but I doubt that'll be a problem. Trust me when I say $1,600+ is the biggest motivation to that oh-so-covetable boo-ti-foo bah-dee!!!

Complexion Affair

2011-08-30T00:47:00.005+08:00

As you may have noticed from pics I've posted on my blog, that I have a high forehead. My mom reasoned that it's because I have a big brain, thus I'm smarter than people with lower foreheads.

Load of crap I say.

What do smarter people equate to? More money of course. But my high forehead seemed to be draining me of my riches!

Let me explain. I figured I have a 10% higher forehead than most people. Which means that I have to apply 10% more cleanser, foam, toner, moisturizer, mist, gel, intensifier, tonic, sunblock, night cream, day cream, serum, lotion, anti-wrinkle creams (not that I needed any) than most people. Bottom line; my face is more costly than most people's!

If that brain were smarter, I'd have gone straight to an aesthetician...

OK, that brain is smart. Cos I have been going to several aestheticians.

And he/she recommended me medicated cleanser, foam, toner, moisturizer, mist, gel, intensifier, tonic, sunblock, night cream, day cream, serum, lotion, anti-wrinkle creams (not that I needed any) which cost more than regular ones.

So much for big brains. And more money.

Abrupt ending. I'm tipsy. Nights.

The Sound of Ah Pao

2011-08-25T21:46:00.004+08:00

Wednesday night is ladies' night, so I usually meet Pao up for a drink. I don't recall when this weekly ritual began but for some reason it was upheld. Perhaps it's supposedly inbetween two gym days, or we just needed an excuse to get drunk midweek. Whatever the reason, I do look forward to our weekly tête-à-têtes... with wine.

However, last night we went to the gym and I didn't expect that alcoholic to spring a wine ~~gulping~~ tasting on me after gym. Not one to rain on anyone's parade, I naturally agreed. Regrettably, since I was caught off guard, I didn't change back into my stylish exec wear. So I had to brave countless "LPPL" looks thrown my way while sipping wine in my gym gear. But this conversation just made it all so much better.

me: I'm planning for a NZ trip. And when I see rolling hills I'm gonna go, "the hills are alive, with the sound of music~"

pao: what's that song? The Wizard of Oz?

me: … no, The Sound of Music...

pao: from The Wizard of Oz?

me: … no, The Sound of Music...

pao: ohohoho

pao: *pondering*

pao: what's the other song from Alice in Wonderland?

me: there is no song in Alice in Wonderland...

Pao can totally lift one's mood on a Wednesday night, or any given night for that matter.

Guyline

2011-08-14T22:12:00.002+08:00

Saturday was brow threading day. The lady suggested I tattoo my eyeline to get the lashes to look thicker. She then offered to line my eye with a pencil just so I could see how it looks. Always a sucker for beauty treatments, I thought why not? While she was lining my eye, she blabbered on about how many guys actually went through the treatment, in a bid to convince me that this is not a girly thing. She added that I could bring my girlfriend to line her eye too.

Girlfriend?

Really?

I mean, I went to thread my brow alone, not dragged there by a girl. And I allowed her to line my eye without hesitation. How gay can that get?

Maybe I'm just a prude. Maybe lots of straight manly guys do these kind of things. So I'm gonna post this question to my straight male reader (SMR).

Hey SMR, do you thread your brows? And will you allow someone to draw your eyeline? Enlighten me!

Maiden Party

2011-08-13T01:00:00.001+08:00

I can no longer say I haven't clubbed (locally) since 2011 commenced. Last Sat I went out because a New Yorker friend was here. I blacked out right around after this photo was taken.

Check out the new do.

And I thought I made it home quietly like the last time. Tough luck! My friends had to drag me kicking and screaming out of Butter. Sobriety is so last season.

Though come to think of it I can still say I haven't gone to a straight club since 2011 commenced. Or that I haven't gone to a gay club since 2011 commenced. Because it's gay night at Butter. I win.

Middle of Somewhere

2011-08-13T00:47:00.004+08:00

I discovered this quaint little place about a month ago and I've been back more than 4 times now, 2 of which happened today!

Give you a hint, you get a river view.

Another HUGE giveaway!!

They converted old shophouses into bars and restaurants.

No queue on a Friday! Where to find?!?

I'm not saying where it is since I've given 2 gigantic hints above. Not that this place's gonna get swamped anytime soon anyway, with no immediate access to public transport and parking being a bitch. Honestly I don't even know where to tell the cab driver to stop; I just stop as near as I think I could and walk the remaining 3km. In fact, I wouldn't be able to tell you the exact location even if I wanted to. So much for me not wanting to say where it is...